Calvary Road Baptist Church

“THE MOTHER EVERY CHILD DESERVES: A GRACIOUS WOMAN”

Proverbs 11.16a 

This has been a particularly challenging week. It began with releasing a confidential internal United States Supreme Court memo authored by Associate Justice Samuel Alito.[1] That there are American citizens who are still unaware of the basic facts of this development is a primary reason our country is crumbling that it is in. I am convinced the single greatest political threat to our nation is the low information voter, those who neither know nor care what is going on.

The immediate response on the left was a jarring shifting of gears by the mindless among them to abandon the notion they have embraced that no one has the right to control their medical care and that masks and vaccines must be mandated for everyone. This regardless of the danger,[2] and regardless of how harmless the Covid-19 threat is to youngsters.[3]

Because of Justice Alito’s leaked memo, the left has suddenly resurrected their mantra justifying abortion on demand as the right of every woman and abandoned their folly of sexual ambiguity that denies women are women and men are men. All of this in a matter of one or two days. They now suddenly know what a woman is, when it suits their murderous abortion agenda.

I find it all very sad. From the lofty and prominent position that God created motherhood to be, we have seen the abasement of marriage by those who most benefit from marriage, the rejection of motherhood by those who are capable of conceiving and carrying a child, and even the abomination of mothers paying men to murder their unborn babies while they are growing in their wombs. The spiritually warped minds who embrace such values claim the so-called freedom and autonomy to make such choices while displaying their enslavement to sinfulness, selfishness, and their complete surrender to the propaganda and manipulation of seducing spirits.[4]

Is it time for a return to basic things? I think so. We are past the age when we can take for granted that foundational truths are understood by one and all. This Mother’s Day message will be something of a return to first principles. Understand that it will start with the bad news but will end up with the great news.

My message is titled “The Mother Every Child Deserves: A Gracious Woman.” I will speak of basics to the matter of womanhood, the matter of character, and the matter of motherhood. 

First, THE MATTER OF WOMANHOOD 

There are different kinds of women. Of course, my message from God’s Word is predicated on the Biblical certainty that men are not women, women are not men, and that your chromosomes are the determining factor of your biological sexuality rather than your wildly varying and profoundly subjective feelings. God decides such things, and He does not make mistakes.

Ten years ago, it was inconceivable that someone born with one sex’s genitalia would insist that reasonable and rational people accept the notion that sex was fluid and had in some way changed because of the onset of subjective feelings. However, that lunacy is all the rage now, and I have observed university students walk out of a seminar when a biology professor asserted that men and women are biologically different.[5]

Understand, then, that my references to women in this message are not references to anyone not possessing ovaries, fallopian tubes, and a uterus at birth, though those organs are sometimes very properly removed by skilled surgeons to preserve or restore the health of afflicted females. I speak of women as traditionally understood, as biologically understood, as Biblically understood,[6] and beyond the reach of political hacks and Marxists who sow seeds of confusion in our society at the direction of the foul spirits driving their rebellion and energizing their zeal against God, the people of God, and the things of God.

With this understood, let me assert once more that there are different kinds of women. In the Old Testament, we find such categories of women who are strange women,[7] evil women,[8] whorish women,[9] foolish women,[10] gracious women,[11] fair women,[12] virtuous women,[13] wise women,[14] prudent women,[15] brawling women,[16] contentious women,[17] angry women,[18] adulterous women,[19] and odious women.[20]

You might have noticed that all but one of those Biblical categorizations refer to character, conduct, disposition, and are the result of personal choices women make, with only the one having to do with appearance, beauty, and physical attractiveness. It reflects God’s valuation of character and conduct as opposed to that which women have little to no control over.

“Fair” is the common English word in the Old Testament describing a woman’s physical beauty, but it is a feature women have relatively little control over. Though prized in our culture (Who doesn’t want to have a pretty mom, a pretty wife, or pretty daughters, or be a pretty person?), you ought to examine those passages in the Hebrew Scriptures that record the real-life experiences of women described as fair.[21] In many cases, their experiences resulting from their physical attractiveness are quite problematic. 

The point that I seek to highlight is made in Proverbs 31.30, where we read, 

“Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.” 

Are we clear about the beauty thing? Do we recognize that physical beauty is not always an asset, but that it has been shown in Scripture to sometimes be a serious liability, creating both danger and temptation for a woman? And isn’t Proverbs 31.30 clear? Beauty is vain, which is to say it is unsubstantial, worthless.[27] As well, we are settled on this notion of womanhood, are we not? Good.

Now that we are on the same page with regard to womanhood, and we are aware of the minor value to God of beauty, being fair to look on, that it is an unsubstantial and worthless attribute, one wonders why fathers tolerate their wives sexualizing their daughters, and training girls to capitalize on a physical feature God says is worthless and Scripture shows to be sometimes dangerous.

These same thoughtless fathers will pay no attention to the spiritual welfare of their daughters, imagining that at the end of a hard day’s work their job is done. Little do they realize that the most important part of their life begins when they get home from work and can then actually parent their children. Would a dad’s attitude toward the upbringing of his daughter change should he come to realize that his daughter’s beauty has as much honor as a gold ring in a swine’s nose if she is a young woman without discretion?[28] That is something to look for. 

Next, THE MATTER OF CHARACTER 

This brings us, first, to a consideration of the character traits and conduct patterns found on display by some women in the Bible and many women in our culture, such as being strange, evil, whorish, foolish, gracious, virtuous, wise, prudent, brawling, contentious, angry, adulterous, and odious. Gracious, virtuous, wise, and prudent, of course, are the character and conduct traits of godly women. But no woman ever starts out that way. While strange, evil, whorish, foolish, brawling, contentious, angry, adulterous, and odious are without question the character and conduct traits of ungodly women.

The question, of course, is what is meant by these labels of bad character and sinful conduct? 

Notice that each of these labels describes a pattern of behavior. It is conduct that reflects a woman’s character.

We now consider the character traits and conduct patterns on display by women in the Bible that are the godly virtues of being gracious, virtuous, wise, and prudent. 

May I speculate a bit on this Mother’s Day regarding the spectrum of godliness represented by the character traits of a gracious woman, a wise woman, a prudent woman, and a virtuous woman?

The pinnacle of motherhood is found in Proverbs 31, that virtuous woman whose price is far above rubies, Proverbs 31.10, whose husband’s heart trusts her, verse 11, whose children rise up and call her blessed, verse 28, and whose husband praises her, also verse 28. Her chief characteristic is her fear of the LORD, verse 30. Thus, no mother who is not a Christian woman can be virtuous.

Suppose one looks back over the virtuous mother’s life of growth and personal development. In that case, you observe that her path to becoming a virtuous mother necessarily led her through the regions of wisdom and prudence. Of course, the fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom. And if wisdom involves making good decisions in response to life’s challenges, prudence might be excellence and skill in implementing those good decisions along the way.

But it all began with such a woman becoming gracious since no woman and no mother begins as a woman who is gracious. Grace is the beginning, is it not? Because grace originates with God.

What kind of woman do you imagine Rahab the harlot was before God’s grace? Strange? Certainly. Evil? Yes. Whorish? Undeniably. Foolish. Possibly. Brawling? Contentious? Angry? I would not be surprised. Adulterous? I don’t know. Odious? I do not know. But God did graciously touch her life, did He not?

What about the Moabite idolater Ruth? Strange? Yes. Evil? She was an idolater. Whorish? Probably not. Foolish? Very possibly. Brawling? I don’t know. Contentious? I don’t know. Angry? I don’t know. Adulterous? No indication of that. Odious? No evidence of that. God also graciously touched her life, as well.

How about the woman at the well, John chapter 4? Five ex-husbands and living with a man she was not married to. Strange? Yes. Evil? Yes. Whorish? Yes. Foolish? Yes. Brawling? Who knows? Contentious? No idea. Angry? Possibly. Adulterous? Without doubt. Odious? Very likely. She came to Jacob’s well alone, suggesting a woman hated by the other women of her village.

Two of the women I have named ended up in the Lord Jesus Christ’s lineage, meaning they were mothers. And is it not very likely a woman who had married five times and was living with a man not her husband was also a mother, though she was a terrible mom? No woman who sleeps around is a good mom, by any measure. This understood, there is no doubt that each woman I named experienced the grace of God. Additionally, they might also have come to exhibit wisdom over time, prudence over time, and came to the end of their lives being virtuous women. Solomon was right when he wrote, 

“Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof.”[37] 

Finally, THE MATTER OF MOTHERHOOD 

We have rehearsed what a woman is. We are now pretty clear about what a good woman is versus a bad woman. Because today is Mother’s Day, I am not speaking to issues related to men, only women, because only women can become mothers. Regardless of what you call yourself, sir, only women can become mothers, either by conception, gestation, and delivery or by adoption.

A woman develops the bad characteristics we have reviewed by being a lost woman, not being reconciled to God through faith in Jesus Christ, and not becoming a Christian woman. This is not to say that every woman who is not a believer in Christ develops the character and conduct traits we found listed in the Bible. Women described so are merely the more extreme examples of godless misconduct by women. On the flip side, not every woman who is a believer in Christ develops the character and conduct traits ascribed to godly women in the Bible. Every Christian woman should become gracious, wise, prudent, and virtuous. By God’s grace, such attainments are well within every Christian woman’s reach.

What is the difference between the one kind of mother and the other kind of mother? The root cause of women, of mothers, who become strange women, evil women, whorish women, foolish women, brawling women, contentious women, angry women, adulterous women, and odious women is sin, pure and simple. Not reconciled to God, such women are dead in trespasses and sins. Their lives are bound up in this evil world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience. And they fulfill the desires of the flesh and of the mind. They are by nature the children of wrath.[38] They have swallowed the Devil’s lies.

Why don’t such mothers ever think about their kids? What little boy wants to wake up in the morning to some strange man sitting at the kitchen table when he wakes up? What little girl is not filled with anguish that her mother is always the first person in the room to laugh at a filthy joke and swears like a drunken sailor?

I grew up the firstborn son of a lost woman. Don’t get me wrong. I loved my mother very much and have no doubt that she loved me. But I always knew there was something very, very wrong. As I grew older, especially after I graduated from engineering school and moved away and was no longer so influenced by her, my conversion to Christ shed light on what was wrong with my mom. She was angry, so very angry. And so very, very lost in her sins.

My mother died eighteen years ago. Her passing filled me with great sorrow. From God’s Word, I know that despite imagining herself to being a good mother, my mom was not a good mother. She loved me. I loved her. But she did not influence me or my brother for Christ.

My mother might have turned from her sins and trusted Christ to become a gracious woman. She might have grown over time to be a wise and prudent woman. She might have ended her life a virtuous woman if only she had turned to Christ. However, insofar as I know, she did not. 

When God created Eve, “Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.”[39] But sin ruined it all. Sin brought death, destruction, and a warped view of reality. Even women privileged to become mothers frequently misuse and abuse their great privileges.

Some women pretend that motherhood is bad, an inconvenience, or an interruption. But the reality is that the personality formation of a child is one of God’s highest and most noble callings.

Other women tolerate motherhood but think nothing of qualifying themselves to be good mothers. They think nothing of sexual immorality, verbally abusing others, including their own children, and being brawling, contentious, and odious women.

The reality is that all have sinned and come short of the glory of God. There is none righteous, no not one, and the Lord Jesus Christ can be the best friend and Savior any woman ever imagined.

From Rahab the harlot, to the woman at the well, to Mary Magdalene (from whom the Lord cast seven demons).[40] Oh, what wickedness and sins those and other women were guilty of committing. They were very, very bad. Yet my Lord Jesus Christ loved them, forgave them, and remade them.

I so regret that my mother did not turn to Christ before she passed. Few days go by that this son who loves his mother does not deeply regret her rejection of my Savior. I go to the cemetery where she is buried frequently to mourn her.

Mom? Do not do that to your son. Do not do that to your daughter. Do not do that to your grandchildren. Do not do that to yourself. Consider the claims of Jesus Christ and receive Him as your Savior before you do anything else.

This room is filled with moms who are now gracious women, having trusted Jesus Christ to the saving of their eternal and undying souls. They do not regret turning to Christ. And many of them are on their way to becoming wise, prudent, and virtuous. Why not become one like them, a child of God through faith in Jesus Christ?

__________

[1] https://nypost.com/2022/05/03/leaker-of-alitos-draft-opinion-could-face-criminal-prosecution/

[2] https://youtu.be/diZ0YoMsWTc and https://youtu.be/o_nKoybyMGg

[3] https://nypost.com/2020/09/01/the-numbers-are-clear-covid-is-no-real-threat-to-kids/ and https://youtu.be/MpnbMIOvbjc

[4] 1 Timothy 4.1

[5] https://youtu.be/n5D_ltpw7CI

[6] Genesis 1.27; 2.21-25

[7] Judges 11.2; Proverbs 2.16; 5.3, 20; 6.24; 7.5; 20.16; 23.27; 27.13

[8] Proverbs 6.24

[9] Proverbs 6.26; Ezekiel 16.30

[10] Proverbs 9.13

[11] Proverbs 11.16

[12] Genesis 12.11; Proverbs 11.22

[13] Ruth 3.11; Proverbs 12.4; 31.10

[14] 2 Samuel 14.2; 20.16; Proverbs 14.1

[15] Proverbs 19.14

[16] Proverbs 21.9; 25.24

[17] Proverbs 21.19; 27.15

[18] Proverbs 21.19

[19] Proverbs 30.20

[20] Proverbs 30.23

[21] Genesis 6.2; 12.11, 14; 24.16; 26.7; 2 Samuel 13.1; 14.27; 1 Kings 1.3, 4; Esther 1.11; 2.2, 3, 7; Job 42.15; Proverbs 11.22; Song 1.15, 16; 4.10; 6.10; Jeremiah 4.30; Hosea 10.11; Amos 8.13

[22] Genesis 12.14-20

[23] Genesis 26.7-11

[24] 2 Samuel 13.1-20

[25] 1 Kings 1.1-4

[26] Esther 1.10-12

[27] Francis Brown, S. R. Driver & Charles A. Briggs, The New Brown-Driver-Briggs-Gesenius Hebrew And English Lexicon, (Peabody, MA: Hendrickson Publishers, 1979), page 210.

[28] Proverbs 11.22

[29] Bruce K. Waltke, The Book Of Proverbs Chapters 1-15, (Grand Rapids, MI: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 2004), page 120.

[30] Ibid., pages 443-444.

[31] Bruce K. Waltke, The Book Of Proverbs Chapters 15-31, (Grand Rapids, MI: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 2005), pages 174-175.

[32] Ibid., pages 182-183.

[33] https://www.britannica.com/dictionary/natter

[34] Ibid., pages 494-494.

[35] Charles Bridges, A Commentary On Proverbs, (Carlisle, PA: The Banner Of Truth Trust, reprinted from the 1846 edition in 1968), page 119.

[36] Waltke, vol 1, pages 521-522.

[37] Ecclesiastes 7.8

[38] Ephesians 2.2-3

[39] Genesis 3.20

[40] Mark 16.9

 

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