Calvary Road Baptist Church
“DOES YOUR HEAD HURT?”
First Corinthians 11.2-16
Because today is Grandparents Day, I will bring a message from God’s Word to you who are young. I plan to rehearse Bible truth to you who are young so that those who are considerably older can bear witness to the truth and wisdom I present to you. The need for this is great, in light of the confusion in our culture and also in our Churches.
Have you ever heard of doing the right thing the wrong way? Let me give you some examples of how you can appear to be doing the right thing, but doing it in the wrong way, resulting in disaster. It is somewhat analogous to baking a cake with all the right ingredients and steps, but adding the ingredients and performing the proper steps in the wrong sequence. The result, of course, is a catastrophe.
Remember Nadab and Abihu, two sons of Israel’s first high priest, Aaron? In Leviticus chapter 10, we read that shortly after the Tabernacle had been erected and the sacrificial system of the Law of Moses had been instituted, Nadab and Abihu tried to do the right thing in the wrong way. Let’s read Leviticus 10.1-2:
1 And Nadab and Abihu, the sons of Aaron, took either of them his censer, and put fire therein, and put incense thereon, and offered strange fire before the LORD, which he commanded them not.
2 And there went out fire from the LORD, and devoured them, and they died before the LORD.
They tried to do the right thing, perform the duties of the priesthood, but in the wrong way. This was done using strange fire that came not from the altar as the LORD had commanded. Would you say the results were disastrous for them? I would say so.
How about Saul, the first king of Israel? In First Samuel chapter 13, we read of Saul waiting for the prophet-priest Samuel to come and offer a sacrifice to God. But after waiting seven days for Samuel to arrive, King Saul impatiently took matters into his own hands and offered the sacrifice himself. He tried to do the right thing by offering a sacrifice but in the wrong way. He presumed to offer the sacrifice himself instead of waiting for an anointed priest. Would you say the results were disastrous for him?
Let’s read the words of the prophet Samuel in First Samuel 13.13-14 to find out:
13 And Samuel said to Saul, Thou hast done foolishly: thou hast not kept the commandment of the LORD thy God, which he commanded thee: for now would the LORD have established thy kingdom upon Israel for ever.
14 But now thy kingdom shall not continue: the LORD hath sought him a man after his own heart, and the LORD hath commanded him to be captain over his people, because thou hast not kept that which the LORD commanded thee.
One final example will serve to illustrate what can happen when you try to do the right thing in the wrong way. Do you remember when David was king, and he ordered the Ark of the Covenant to be brought from Kirjathjearim to Jerusalem, Second Samuel chapter 6? Do you also remember that the Ark of the Covenant was placed on an ox cart to perform this task?
The priests transporting the Ark were attempting to do the right thing, but they performed their task in a manner not prescribed by God. Remember, according to the instructions given by Moses, the Ark of the Covenant could only be transported by suspending it between two poles that rested on the backs of priests.[1]
What happened to the Ark while it was being transported on the ox cart? One of the oxen stumbled, and the cart tipped. To prevent the Ark from falling to the ground, a priest named Uzzah reached out and placed his hand on the Ark to steady it.[2] The result? God killed him.[3] Why? Because God didn’t want any man’s hands on His Ark. That’s why He wanted it carried with poles.
These three events, and numerous similar examples that are found in the Bible, illustrate a principle God has very clearly pointed out to His people; that the right thing must be done the right way. He has established the principle that the process is critical to the product.
With that principle in mind, please turn with me to Psalm 127.1. Once you are there, I invite you to stand and read the verse aloud with me:
“Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.”
Does it need to be proven, today, that your marriage and household will not be what it ought to be unless the LORD builds it? I think not. And do we all agree that to have a marriage and household that is built by the LORD, it must be built the LORD’s way? I think we all agree with that, at least theoretically.
If you are as yet unmarried, recently married, or no longer a newlywed husband or wife, recognize that for the LORD to build your family and your home, your household, it will have to be built His way. That is, the right thing must be done in the right way. The process is critical to the product.
This is indisputable. Consider this real-life reality. Though he never puts his hands on a single nail or grasps a hammer even one time, it is the architect who builds the structure when those who are engaged in the actual labor follow the plans of the designer. Can you imagine anyone disagreeing with that statement?
Husbands? Wives? I presume that you want a marriage that is pleasing to God. Right? And that you want to have a home in which God will bless the rearing of your children. Correct? Then reflect with me a bit. How many successes in marriage as a husband or a wife have you racked up? And how many children have you successfully raised to this point in the nurture and admonition of the Lord?
We are agreed, then. You have no experience as a successful spouse or parent at this point, no matter how long you have been married or how old your kids are. Would you claim to be a master of the complexities of marriage or parenting?
No? Then it is likely that you would be wise enough to agree that the erecting of this structure called a home, with marriage and child-rearing being involved, it is best to follow the plans of the Architect who knows exactly what He is doing.
To state the matter another way, critical to the right thing, which is to have a marriage and a family that glorifies God, you must function within your home the right way, the prescribed way, the Biblical way. Does anyone disagree with this assertion? Good.
With that established, I want us to look at one of the most fundamental aspects of a godly marriage and home, the Scriptural authority and leadership structure. And if we understand that critical to doing the right thing is doing it the right way, we will also understand that God’s Divine order, as we see it in our text for today, is not optional.
What needless confusion abounds in the lives of so many children, and what unnecessary conflict exists in the lives of so many men and women, husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, who have resorted to their own devices regarding matters with which they have no previous successful and rewarding experience. It is as heartbreaking as it is unnecessary.
We look to First Corinthians 11.2-16. Please turn there and stand for the reading of God’s Word once more, following along silently while I read aloud:
2 Now I praise you, brethren, that ye remember me in all things, and keep the ordinances, as I delivered them to you.
3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
4 Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head.
5 But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven.
6 For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.
7 For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.
8 For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man.
9 Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.
10 For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels.
11 Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.
12 For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God.
13 Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
14 Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him?
15 But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering.
16 But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God.
God’s Divine order for husbands and wives in marriage is not optional. This is understood because,
First, GOD’S REVELATION OF THE DIVINE ORDER IS STATED
Notice what Paul writes in verses 2 and 3.
In verse 2, we see Paul’s praise for obedience:
“Now I praise you, brethren, that ye remember me in all things, and keep the ordinances, as I delivered them to you.”
What does Paul praise the Corinthians for? And, also, what should parents praise their children for? Do not praise your kids for their beauty or athletic ability. And do not praise your kids for their intelligence. Don’t praise children for anything that isn’t related to their character, or their obedience, or their spirituality. The Corinthians were supremely gifted in every respect, but Paul never praised them for any of that.[4] What does he praise them for? He praises them for their obedience. That congregation certainly had their share of problems, but there was one aspect of their Christian lives that Paul found to be praiseworthy. Notice what kind of obedience Paul congratulated them for. He praises them for obedience in thought (“that ye remember me in all things”), as well as obedience in deed (“and keep the ordinances, as I delivered them to you”). Parents, make sure that you praise your children for their obedience, not how pretty they are, not how smart they are, and not how fast they can run. Children have no control over their physical or intellectual attributes, but they do have the option to obey and comply. Always reward and reinforce compliance, and never reward rebellion, sin, or folly.
Then, in verse 3, we find the divine prescription for order in the home and in the Church:
“But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.”
Note the meaning of “head.” Paul is using the term “head” to signify the person whose role is to give direction, that which provides direction. Meaning that, according to this verse, God leads Christ, Christ leads the husband, and the husband leads the wife. Not ought to lead, as if living in the world of ought to be, but is leading since we are in the world of is. Also, note the meekness of Christ. Are Christ and God the Father equal in essence? If you believe the Bible, then your answer is “Yes.” Both the Father and the Son are Members of the Triune Godhead. They are, therefore, equal in every respect. Yet the Lord Jesus Christ submits to the Father. For how long has the Son yielded in cheerful subordination to His Father? From eternity past.[5] Therefore, if Christ’s example is any indication, a person’s place in the Divine authority structure has nothing to do with superiority and inferiority, per se. Spiritual and mature Christian wives recognize that this passage does not state or imply that wives are spiritually, intellectually, or morally inferior to their husbands in any way, but that what is here written is another revelation of the Divine order.
Second, WE KNOW THAT THE DIVINE ORDER IS NOT OPTIONAL BECAUSE REBELLION AGAINST THIS DIVINE ORDER IS SIN
Let’s consider this concerning both men and women:
First, with the man, the husband, verse 4:
“Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head.”
What is the infraction described here? The infraction is to pray or to prophesy with your head covered. Should it not be obvious that Paul is taking it for granted with his audience that what is important here is not what the individual intends by his manner of praying or prophesying, but how his actions are perceived by others? I think so. What is the interpretation? Why is it wrong to approach God in prayer or to speak for God with your head covered? In the Corinthian’s culture, having your head covered, probably with a veil, was a token of a wife’s submission to her husband. For a man to pray to God or speak for God while conveying submission to his wife, when he should be displaying leadership in her life according to God’s design, is an affront. It’s yielding one’s God-given position. And what is the result of this infraction? According to Paul, when a man does this, he dishonors his head. But Who is the man’s head? The Lord Jesus Christ. So, when a man does something while praying or preaching that communicates to others that he is not the leader in his home ... he dishonors the Lord Jesus Christ. That’s severe. Would you say that this is sin? I would.
What about the woman, the wife? Verse 5:
“But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven.”
What is the infraction described? For the woman, according to the inspired Apostle Paul, to pray or prophesy with her head uncovered is improper. What is the interpretation? In the Corinthian’s culture, women wore veils over their heads as a sign of submission to their husbands. So, when a woman prays to God or speaks on behalf of God without covering her hair, she communicates that no man rules her, in effect showing herself to be in rebellion against her husband’s authority, that she is not submissive to him, that she has been “liberated” from him.
What is the result of this infraction? She shames her head. But who is her head? Her head is her husband. When a woman usurps her husband’s position or rebels against him, she dishonors him. And the offense is so serious that Paul says it’s virtually the same thing as that woman having a shaved head. That gives rise to another question. What is the significance of a woman having a shaved head? In Corinth, the heads of adulterous women were shaved, much like what happened to French women who fraternized with German soldiers after the Allies occupied France.[6] So, when a Corinthian saw a woman with short hair, it would be assumed that she was an adulterer whose hair was not yet fully grown back out after being shaved. Short hair had ominous implications in that culture.
Think about these two cases for a moment. Praying to God and declaring Divine truth by witnessing or preaching the Word of God is supposed to occur in the lives of those who are in submission to God. Correct? And submission to God will be evidenced by conformity to His Divine plan. Correct? What hypocrisy must it be for a man, then, to do those things which indicate submission to God, when he is in rebellion against God by not functioning as the leader in his home? And what hypocrisy it is for a woman to witness and pray, seemingly in submission to her Lord, while she is rebellious against her husband or unwilling to submit to him.
Sir, if you do not act like what Paul declares you actually to be in verse 3... you sin. Ladies, if you do not act like what Paul declares you to be in verse 3 ... you sin. Act like the leader of the family if you are the husband, and conduct yourself as the follower of your husband if you are the wife if you have any hope of the LORD building your house.
Third, WE KNOW THAT THE DIVINE ORDER IS NOT OPTIONAL BECAUSE REASONS FOR THE DIVINE ORDER ARE STRAIGHTFORWARD
Notice the cultural perspective Paul refers to, verse 6:
“For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.”
To explain what Paul says: If a woman is going to look rebellious, she might as well go all the way and look like an adulterous woman. Paul is not advocating that women look like adulteresses or rebel against their husbands in the extreme, but uses hyperbole (exaggeration for effect) to emphasize that wives should submit to Divinely instituted authority and conduct themselves like it, as well. To explain what Paul accomplishes: He communicates to his readers a correct understanding of the fact that the so-called “liberated” actions displayed by a woman differ only in degree from the rebelliousness of an adulteress. The issue is not resistance to a husband’s authority in her life, but resistance to God’s authority in her life. In the Corinthian culture, that show of rebellion against a husband’s ordained position as the leader in the home was short hair on a woman. For the man, abandonment of his position was evidenced by having his head covered. And though different cultures have different customs, the principle is the same: Your behavior should communicate compliance to the Divine order.
Now, notice the consummate logic employed by Paul. These are the reasons that lie back of the Divine order. To refute the Divine order and show Paul wrong, one must first refute the logic of the next three statements. Verse 7:
“For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.”
Who is whose glory? The man is the image and glory of God, and the woman is the glory of man. The man submits to Christ because he is the glory of God. The woman submits to her man because she is the glory of her man. Of course, feminists bristle at this notion. Verse 8:
“For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man.”
Who was “built” first? This matter of one’s position in the chain of command has not to do with ability, leadership skills, or intelligence, but the order of creation. First Timothy 2.11-13 supports this:
11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.
12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
Again, an issue that feminists write books to refute. I have several in my library, unconvincing to anyone who believes the Bible. Verse 9:
“Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.”
Who was “built” for whom? Genesis 2.18 indicates that Eve was created by God to fulfill a specific need in Adam’s life. That establishes the place in the family authority structure for the husband and the wife. I wonder why feminists, even so-called Christian feminists, have serious issues with the Genesis account of creation.
The conclusions that follow are several:
First, the Apostle of Jesus Christ declares that women ought to have a human head over them, according to verse 10:
“For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels.”
What Paul is indicating here is determined by who he is referring to when he uses the word “angels.” “Angel” simply means messenger and can refer to either human messengers, such as pastors in Revelation 1.20, or supernatural messengers, such as the angel Gabriel. If Paul is referring to supernatural angels, then he is stating that angels who obey God find Christian women’s rebellion to their husbands offensive. But if his reference is to pastors, then he is saying that women need human authority over them for the pastor’s sake. And I assure you that the women who usually cause pastors problems are women who are not in submission to their husband’s authority.
Next, Paul concludes that men and women depend on each other, according to verses 11-12:
11 Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.
12 For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God.
Christian men have no reason to get cocky about being the leader in a marriage, or about being the boss. After all, God uses foolish things to confound the wise. The criteria for male leadership in marriage is different than it has been throughout human history, in this respect.
In every corner of the world, men are dominant because males are typically bigger, stronger, and more aggressive than most women. With the advance of the Gospel, the structure of marriages was not altered. Rather, the reasons for the structure altered. No longer should a husband be the spiritual leader of his home because most men can out-muscle most women, because most men do not get pregnant for nine months at a time, or find themselves periodically distracted.
The reason for men to provide spiritual leadership for their wives, despite their spiritual equality in the sight of God, is because it reflects the functional hierarchy seen with God the Father and the His Son, Jesus Christ. It also means that there is no need for women to feel unimportant and unneeded. The real fact of the matter is that men and women were created to fulfill different functions in a marriage and a home, with both being profoundly important. So, when a man does not lead, or a woman will not properly follow, they are just plain out of position to fulfill their proper function in a marriage.
Will there be consequences? Profound ones, not only in their lives, but in the lives of their children, and in the lives of others in their congregation. Christ is not represented well when husbands refuse to lead and wives refuse to follow. As well, God is dishonored, the husband is shamed, and the wife is out of position. They will not receive grace from God to occupy their assigned roles in the marriage and the family. Grace is given to do what God wants you to do, not to enable you to ignore the role He has designed to best suit you for His glory.
Third, Paul directs his readers to judge for yourselves, verses 13-15:
13 Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
14 Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him?
15 But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering.
Does it look right for a woman to pray without a veil? Doesn’t long hair on a man seem unnatural and shameful? But for a woman to have long hair, since it is given to be a covering for her, or a veil, it’s a glory to her. Those are the indisputable facts as the Corinthians were to see them. And when you consider that “nature” refers to one’s native sense of propriety, and when you consider that Paul asks them to judge for themselves, the following becomes quite clear: Paul was appealing to the Corinthians to evaluate these matters in terms of their culture. If something is effeminate behavior in one’s culture, men shouldn’t do it. If it’s masculine behavior in one’s culture, women should not do it. If it conveys a sense of rebellion, avoid it.
FINAL POINT. THE DIVINE ORDER IS NOT OPTIONAL BECAUSE REACTION AGAINST THE DIVINE ORDER IS SEDITION
Verse 16:
“But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God.”
People will always want to argue about this subject of male leadership in marriage. Feminists, whether they be men or women, will argue that Paul was a chauvinist, or that his arguments no longer apply in the 21st century, or that women have to step up if they are married to a wimp.
Or there will be men who will fuss about being leaders in their homes and women who will fuss about the outward signs of submission to their husbands. But Paul refused to get sucked into an argument about it. He just wasn’t in the habit of arguing about whether truth was truth or not.
Neither were other Churches willing to argue about what was or was not the truth. They just declared it. To Timothy Paul wrote,
“But foolish and unlearned questions avoid, knowing that they do gender strifes.”[7]
Someone who doesn’t know the Divine order is unlearned. Someone who knows it but does not follow it is unspiritual and unwise. Does anyone imagine for one moment that God’s way of ordering a home is not the best way to order a home? Best for the husband? Best for the wife? Best for the children? And best for the congregation and the cause of Christ?
Nothing in the Word of God suggests God wants married men to lead and women who are wives to follow their leadership because men are better leaders because men are more spiritual, or because men are superior in any way. Men are to lead because it is God’s will. Period. And both men and women are to conduct themselves in such a way that they reinforce and demonstrate the Divine order, using the customs of their society to do so, where those customs do not conflict with Scripture.
In Corinth, the custom was that men were uncovered, and women were covered, as a sign of their respective position in the family unit. But for the Jewish people, the opposite was true. Jewish men prayed with their heads covered while Jewish women prayed uncovered. In either case, to ignore the social custom and behave or dress in such a way as to confuse the body language message you are supposed to send, that the husband is the leader and the wife is in submission to him, is confusing, is appropriate, and is, in the end, sinful.
More than just outward conformity is at issue here. Paul was inspired by God to lead family units not only to look like they conform to the Divine order but actually to conform to the Divine order. He wants the husband actually to lead as well as act like he leads. He wants the wife to yield to his leadership, not just to look like she is.
Young people, this is for you. You fellows marry someone who will follow your leadership. And you women, marry no one who does not demonstrate to you that he both can and will lead you.
What’s at stake here? It’s a matter of doing the right thing the right way. You may have a home that’s “Christian,” but if dad is not the spiritual leader and mom strongly supportive of and in submission to his leadership, disaster will eventually result.
How do I know? Because the right thing must be done the right way. Because the process is critical to the product. Because every example in the Word of God of people trying to do God’s will their way results in nothing but heartache, pain, and suffering.
The bottom line is this: Ladies, you either trust God to lead you through your husband, or you don’t trust God. The kind of husband you are married to is not the issue. Guys, you either trust God to work in your wife’s life to follow you or not. The kind of woman she is is not the issue.
Let me close with this question: Does your head hurt?
Are you living the kind of life that shames your head?
If you are a woman who shames your head, your husband, you are sinning.
And if you are a man who shames your head, your Savior, you are sinning.
Men, I advise you not to argue with anyone about your role as the leader. Just lead. Wives, I suggest you not argue with your husband about his conduct. Just follow. It is remarkable what God does when a Christian man acts like a Christian husband, and when a Christian wife acts like a Christian wife.
You grandparents here today; I have an assignment for you. Back me up on this. Support what God’s Word teaches to your kids and your grandkids. Your prayers and influence can be more effective than you might imagine.
__________
[1] Exodus 25.14-15
[2] 2 Samuel 6.2-6
[3] 2 Samuel 6.7
[4] 1 Corinthians 1.7
[5] John 8.29
[6] https://flashbak.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/PA-9070914.jpg
[7] 2 Timothy 2.23
Would you like to contact Dr. Waldrip about this sermon? Please contact him by clicking on the link below. Please do not change the subject within your email message. Thank you.
Pastor@CalvaryRoadBaptist.Church